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[07 Feb 2010|09:53pm] |
I said it last year and I will say it again...
God damnit I love this game!
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[31 Jan 2010|03:24am] |
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Also? Word of the day = boobs.
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[20 Jan 2010|08:04pm] |
Ugh. I hate behind sick. I LIKE my weight training but I didn't think going with a temp over 100 was a good idea. That and I promised dreamsofstars I wouldn't if my temp was still high. So now I have to make it up Fri-Sun with serious gym time but I can do that.
So...people know that part of my whole weight loss thing is running in The Disney Endurance Series races. Right now, I'm slated to do the ESPN 5k at the end of Feb and the Princess 1/2 marathon the next weekend after that.
There's an Animal Kingdom obstacle course/5k in June that I really want to do. It sounds like so much fun:
Expedition Everest™ Challenge, a race adventure with bite, is coming June 12, 2010 to Disney's Endurance Series. Just after sunset, teams of two take on the exotic terrain of Disney's Animal Kingdom® Theme Park in a fun, competitive 5K run, obstacles and scavenger hunt. The reward for completing the challenge is an exclusive after-hours party at Disney's Animal Kingdom® Theme Park. If you have what it takes to conquer this challenge, then find a teammate and join the trek! The challenge and the party will double your fun! If no one will brave this adventure with you, then sign up for the solo trek.
I'd really love to do it with a partner and my usual partner (my mother) is going to be in Norway. I think. I can't keep up with her anymore XD I don't know what the registration fee is yet (the 1/2 marathon is $120 and I bet it will be less), but you'll have a free place to stay and theirs always discount airfare to Orlando! Plus, I can get FL resident tickets for Disney World and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter should be open by then at Universal.
So yes...anybody want to come play in the Animal Kingdom after dark with me? Btw, a 5k is only 3.2 miles! That's not bad, really!
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[16 Jan 2010|01:42am] |
If you wanted to know something, this is the time to ask it. I'm painfully honest when I'm this drunk. Personally, RP-wise...anything. Just ask before I decide bed is better then being awake.
And I ask when the one person that matters went to bed. Oops?
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[14 Jan 2010|12:03am] |
So...job hunting sucks. I'm not going into anymore detail.
But.
Yesterday, my parents offered out of the blue to let me go back to school. They recognize the fact that the market sucks and going back to school has been said to be the best thing to do for my age group. As much as I hated college (the work, not my school obviously), I'm seriously considering it. University of Central Florida has Hospitality and Tourism degrees, which I think I'd be good at. And, since I have most of the Gen Ed stuff out of the way from my first degree, it should only take me 3-4 semesters, 1.5-2 years tops. And they are offering to pay for it, plus of course living in my house rent free (it was an investment for them, they tell me not to feel guilty but I do), as long as I have a part-time job to pay my own expenses.
It's an...amazing deal and opportunity. But I'm still thinking about it of course. It's a big decision.
The UCF mascot is the Knights. If I do go, I want an icon of a Hokie dressed as a Knight XD
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[31 Dec 2009|08:42pm] |
This year has been a year.
I was hoping to be more ahead in my life then I am right now. Granted, I have job, which is much improved on last year, even if I hate it. I'm 30 pounds lighter, which is also something, but not exactly where I wanted to be.
But.
I have two wonderful cats who I thank god for everyday. Herman and Lily keep me sane and I love them more then life itself sometimes. Seriously, there are some days that they are the reason I get up, because they need someone to take care of them. They deserve someone to take care of them. I have amazing parents who are being more then cooperative while I try and find myself and what I want out of life. Seriously, I know I'm an only child and they spoil me, but right now, I can't be more thankful. I need this space to figure things out and it's amazing and I'm lucky to get it. I'm starting with a personal trainer to take my weight lose more seriously and to get healthy in 2010. I'm slowly putting in applications to Marriot and Sea World and not letting Disney's rejection get me down. They want experience, I'll get them experience. And I have the most amazing friends anyone could ask for. dreamsofstars I love you so and don't know what I'd do without you. And I'm so glad I finally have Denise's correct number and that Melissa is staying in the area. There are even some people are work who I think could be friend material. I might not be so alone in Florida anymore.
Overall? I'm not exactly happy with 2009, but I think it's leading to a better 2010. As my dad said, everyone goes through a hard point in their life. This is mine and when I get through it, I'll be better for it.
Also? I'm watching the Chik-fil-a bowl and just reminded how fucking proud I am to be a Hokie. It's a source of my strength and I'm not afraid to admit that. I love my school and the community it breeds.
Happy New Years everyone and I hope you all have a great 2010.
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[20 Dec 2009|12:18am] |
Someone give tofindmelookup a home before he drives me crazy. Why is this bugging me so much? Itch needs to be scratched dammit, and figures its a Super itch.
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[03 Dec 2009|12:10am] |
Last year on the eve of my 23rd birthday, I had a major anxiety attack. I'd just moved to a new state, couldn't find a job for shit, I was all alone and was just in general panicking.
On the eve of my 24th birthday, I'm still not exactly happy with my life (I had the anxiety attack at home over Thanksgiving >_>) but I have a new skill, I ran a 10k, I lost 30 pounds, I'm training for a half marathon, I have a sucky job but a job and I have leads towards where I want to go in Disney. It's something. And really, a lot of the reason I'm not doing better is the economy which isn't my fault. Everyone is struggling, not just me.
I got a birthday package from my mom today. I had had a horrible day at work so she made me open it. They were two silver bracelets. I'm wearing one and I don't think I'm going to take it off anytime soon. It says:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change COURAGE to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I need to control the things I can (weight, marathon training) and not worry about the things I can't (jobs, economy, people). It's not easy but it's something.
Happy 24th me. May you be lighter and happier by 25.
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[26 Nov 2009|08:45pm] |
Today was a perfect family day. My family was all happy to see me and even celebrated my birthday (that never happens). There was good food and good times and no drama. It was perfect.
My dog missed me. That helped a lot to see yesterday.
And I applied for a job at Disney today. Cross your fingers for me because I really need it.
I'm so glad I came home.
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[12 Nov 2009|12:48pm] |
I'm so annoyed with people today. Specific people too. It an annoying nagging feeling.
Basically,? I just wanted to say people suck. That's about where I am at the moment.
EDIT: Moms are amazing things. Especially mine. She helped calm me down and make me see what was going on. I don't take change well. I know that. And since I know big change is coming, my fuse is short, so things that usually I could brush off are majorly effecting me. Ugh. Not making change any easier.
But one person is being selfish and emotionally cruel and I would be annoyed no matter what. So I am still annoyed but not as much as I was at lunch. Yes, this makes sense, hush.
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[11 Nov 2009|12:03am] |
Today is one of those days that I just hate people.
A co-worker thought she was being funny when she kept cracking jokes about 'those darn crazy people from Virginia Tech.' If she makes that joke one more time, I'm letting her have it. She didn't have to wonder if her friends were alive or dead while being states away. She didn't have a panic attack when they found out they graduated from the same school as the Fort Hood Shooter. She didn't have flashbacks and walk out of the room when having to listen to the radio in the middle of class when an active shooting closed down downtown Orlando. Fucking Bitch.
Oh yes. And implying that the Orlando shooter must have gone to Virginia Tech ISN'T FUNNY EITHER!
And then I get home to find out someone is being the most selfish bitch I can ever imagine. Like, I'm speechless. And taking it out on someone who doesn't deserve it and I can't say anything. Keep your problems to yourself, no one needs your issues dumped on them. Repeatedly.
But! There is one vindictively good thing that happened today. One of the DC Snipers, who made it scary to go to the gas station, or out anywhere for that matter, and locked down my high school for weeks my Junior year, was put to death today under the death penalty in Virginia. And I don't even feel ashamed for feeling glad either.
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[06 Nov 2009|06:13pm] |
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Can people please stop with the shooting people already? Thanks.
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[20 Oct 2009|11:07pm] |
This. Just...This.
Sell The Team Danny Boy. DC and the Skins Nation BEGS you. Stop ruining one of my favorite things.
I swear, if I didn't have the Hokies, I probably would have been put off football all together. And I would be very very sad.
In other words, the first full week in December, I will have a dreamsofstars. This like, makes my year.
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[07 Oct 2009|09:47pm] |
Today was a very enlightening day. It was one of those days were I realize that I'm an adult, even though I don't feel like one. Twice today, a person older then me and who I respected, looked to me for help and guidance, as a reliable source.
One was my teacher, who when wondering how to spell something on the board, looked right at me and asked if it was right. I was like, "Why are you looking at me?" And Kristina proceeded to tell me that she respected the knowledge I had, especially after I had helped her with math homework for one of her gen ed classes (she's going to night school to get her business degree). It wasn't something I had ever done before, but after reading the chapter in the book, I was able to figure it out and explain it to her. Now, we don't know yet if I was right, but it was closer then she had been able to get. I was in fact honored when I walked in Monday and she specifically asked me for help, even though I know it must have been slightly embarrassing for her to ask her student. She even told me today how she was so happy for the help that she'd told her husband. I was frankly honored she thought so much of my help because I really look up to Kristina and she knows that I struggle with trying to down play my degree, since I'm one of the very few who have one at the school and I don't want to make it a big deal, while still being proud of being a Hokie...if that makes sense.
The other was Brenda. She is a fellow student, who has a child my age even, and she has a lot of heart, but she struggles sometimes in dealing with difficult animals. She was given this American Eskimo Dog who snapped at her and was just feeding off her nervous energy. I had a lovely standard poodle who I was scissoring and Jovana, my teacher, asked me if I was afraid of the Eskimo dog and I said no. Of course that meant I had to switch and do the dumbass dog, which I didn't want to do but I didn't want Brenda getting bit either. And I'm glad I did because this dog was a dumbass. Bathing him was like bathing a cat and required alot of patience, that comes from experience. While he was drying in a cage, I went to help Brenda scissor the poodle and she asked me how I did it, in a very curious and interested voice. How I dealt with the stupid dogs with patience and without being afraid, so she could learn how to be like me. I told her that I honestly didn't know, that I'd been doing it for so long that I just did it. Then she commented about how I have this peaceful, serene aura that just is a very calming influence on the people and animals around me, and she was very startled one day when I came in cussing and full of fire because I was having a shitty week, because it was so unlike me. I told her that I'd been told that before, but I had never been able to see it in myself so I don't know how I did it.
It's just odd. I still don't see myself as much of an adult, as someone people can look up too. And yet, I'm finding people are. This is also after last week two of my teachers, Kristina and Jovana, told me that I was one of the most cultured people they had ever met. It's just...bizarre. And like, majorly flattering but I just...don't know what to think.
I guess it's just hard to grasp that people look to me for help and rely on the knowledge I have, when I feel like I'm floundering.
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[23 Sep 2009|04:40pm] |
I've been thinking a lot lately about the eb and flow of people in my life. I once heard someone say that people come into your life at the exact moment you need them and then move on when you don't. I always thought that sounded kinda lonely, but it doesn't change the fact that it's true.
I have one person who I felt like I used to be really close to, who just doesn't need me anymore. And I'm beginning to be okay with this, even if it hurt at first and sometimes still does. I have another who ebbed out on their own accord and now seems to think I should come crawling back to them, irritating me to no end. I have people who I work with every other day who I become friends with, but as more graduate each mouth, they just kinda go away (one literally because she moves back to Maine next week :/). And yet, I have one person who is excited for me to graduate so I can do things with her because we've never found someone like us to do them with and another who has become one of the most important people in my life and I barely knew her a year ago.
I'm not like, depressed or anything, just thinking about this concept a lot. And I just woke up from a two hour nap and tend to get introspective when I'm half asleep. And it's better then thinking about the bloodwork I went to the doctor for this morning. 10 vials of blood and one cup of the foulest drink known to man better reveal something.
Also, I love how my class mate, who is off today too because her in-laws are in town, texted me to know what exit to get off I-4 to get to the Magic Kingdom and I uh...kinda knew the answer. Off hand. >_>
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[27 Aug 2009|07:44pm] |
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This is when you get to ask me anything. I mean anything, this time -- fandom things, real life things, things you think you should know, things you think I should have told you a long time ago. Anonymous posting is permitted but screened.
I do reserve the right to say that there's an answer and it's private. Why the hell not? My life is in major flux right now so answers might not be current in the next two months, but I'll give it a shot. Also I've been in over sharing mode lately so this kinda fits. I really wish I wasn't so maybe this will help?
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[26 Aug 2009|07:26pm] |
So...you know how in every education setting, there's the cool teacher? Or cool counselor or whatever, the one teacher that every one wants to impress and be their favorite. You know the one.
Well, at my grooming school, it's Ivana. She usually only does the night class, except on Wednesdays when she fills in all day so Ashley can have a day off. She's younger, like most of us, and is just very young in her life style. She still looking for what she wants to do for the rest of her life, at the moment she's teaching so she can fund her nursing school. She's kinda odd in that she once took home a bunch of ticks from a dog to put in resin and make jewelry out of. We talk sex and stuff with her all the time and she's just...the cool teacher.
Well, one day a few weeks ago, she was talking about Mexico City. I made a comment about something, since I have been there. Once the initial conversation died down, she came over to me and said that I sounded like I spoke from experience. Then we found out we'd climbed the same pyramids near the city and our conversation about travels and stuff just went from there. I mentioned Paris and she said that was one place she always wanted to go. So I had my mom bring down her scrapbook from Paris so I could show it to her. Ivana thought it was the coolest thing ever and basically parked down next to my table so I could tell her all about as she read it (I suspect that's why she gave me a standard poodle to do >_> I'd have to be just sitting there combing all day XD). The album made her decide that me and mom were the coolest people ever. We talked about all the traveling we want to do (it's very rare I find someone as excited about traveling and new experiences like me and my mom and she said the same thing!) and she mentioned ghost tours. I told her about the various ghost tours I'd done in London, Baltimore and Savannah and now, despite the fact that it's against the rules for teachers and students to socialize outside class, she wants me to go with her on a bunch she has planned around Florida.
I'm the cool teacher's favorite now XD I'm so amused.
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[14 Aug 2009|09:29pm] |
I've come to a realization. One of the reasons I'm so down and depressed lately.
It seems like so many things that I have worked so hard for are being taken or someone is trying their damned best to take it from me. From my meds ruining my 10k training and my health (and when I get that kinda under control to where I can function, I find out it may have been the wrong thing after all*) to the circumstances (including the economy) ruining the careful plan I had made for my life and dumping me into this existence which I hate to even when I try to escape it and RP by someone who barely plays at all.
No wonder I feel so defeated dammit. And tired. Really tired. I think I need to go to bed.
* I mentioned on Twitter but if you don't follow me: My mother was going through my medical file to get ready for my doctor's appointment next week and came to a realization. There's a good chance that when I was younger, after the surgery for my ovarian cyst, I was misdiagnosed with PCOS. The metformin has always made me sick which is why I was never serious about taking it before. Whenever I told the doctors, they never seemed to believe me so never checked to see if it could be something else. So now, when I'm trying to be a responsible adult, I started being good about taking it and it made me violently sick. For a month. To the point I'm still feeling the after affects and I can't eat certain foods without my stomach cramping up. Apparently, one of the symptoms, one of the many I have, of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, is being misdiagnosed as PCOS. Which would explain why the metformin NEVER WORKED. So I may have just spent that whole month being sick, not to mention all the problems I've had over the years, FOR NOTHING. Granted, this can't be confirmed until we go to the doctor and the doctor isn't a quack like the last one I went to down here (I called when I had complications with the metformin and he told me to go to my general doctor for my diabetes. My response? I DON'T HAVE DIABETES YOU JACK ASS!) but if it is....oh am I going to be fucking pissed.
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[07 Aug 2009|11:51pm] |
Stolen from lots of people
1) Comment with any character you know I've written/RPed (or thought about playing or writing).
2) Receive three bits of trivia about their sexuality: practices, preferences, experiences, fantasies, kinks, etc.
If your responding, you know someone I play now or have played in the past, so anyone is fair game.
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